Attention Ladies, Saving Money Tops List of Frugal Male Turn Ons

Open any men’s magazine on the news stand and your are virtually guaranteed to read an article about the top ways to turn on the opposite sex.  The same is true for most popular women’s magazines.  Most lists have things like physical attributes and intelligence in common.  However, there is one attribute missing from the list of top male turn ons that I think could be included:  Saving money.

Gifts from the Heart, Fastest Way to Our Heart

They say the fastest way to a guy’s heart is through his stomach, implying that a great cook can land even the most eligible bachelor.  I admit I have a weakness for great cooking (and the stomach to prove it), but there is something that ranks even higher for us frugal guys.  Last year my wife gave me one of the greatest frugal Valentine’s Day gifts ever.  While most people were out crawling the mall jewelry stores and searching for the perfect electronic gadget for their husbands, my wife picked up a glass candy jar, rose petals, and colored paper.  She spent the better part of a day handwriting 50 reasons why she loved me on each strip of paper, filling the jar with a festive combination of pink, red and white notes on a bed of rose petals.  She presented the jar to me on Valentine’s Day and watched as I read each message from the jar.  It was one of the most meaningful gifts I’ve ever received.

Is Saving Money Really a Turn On?

Being a saver is a turn on for most husbands, however I’m not sure it is a mutually desired trait for most wives.  I’m sure most women (and many men) would prefer to have a spouse that spent money showering them with lavish gifts.  After all, these are the types of examples we see on television.  Our entertainment industry has made “bling” a household word and the object of many people’s desire.  Unfortunately, “bling” requires a lot of money that the average person simply cannot afford.  Some spend like crazy anyway, racking up a mountain of debt in the process.  I don’t know about you, but there is nothing sexy about a mountain of debt!

When it comes to the frugal guy (or girl) in your life, it may not be the act of saving money that is a turn on, rather it is the shared attributes of those who enjoy living frugally that causes sparks to fly.  In the case of my wife and I, a mutual desire to be better stewards of money and resources, and a collection of shared goals centered around the idea of financial independence, keeps us close and moving in the same direction, financially and otherwise.


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18 comments and counting

  1. 1. Writer's Coin on September 3rd, 2008

    Unfortunately, most women equate expensive gifts with effort. But I’ve learned that if you really ramp up the effort, it can make a huge difference. If I give my wife something that’s expensive but was easy for me to buy, I can see her not being too thrilled about it. But if it’s something that took a lot of thought, effort and time to plan (regardless of price), I know she’ll appreciate it.

    And don’t forget that the element of surprise is one of the greatest gifts you can give.

  2. 2. Jeff@MySuperChargedLife on September 3rd, 2008

    I read somewhere that marrying the right person accounts for about 90% of your happiness in life. I think this is pretty accurate.

    Being on the same page about how to save and spend money is definitely important. I hear time and again that most marital spats are about finances.

    Fortunately, my wife and I get along very well in this area. We will have been married for 17 years in January and I believe this has a lot to do with our success. If you don’t get along outside the bedroom, you probably won’t be happy about what happens in there either.

  3. 3. Enriched Mom on September 3rd, 2008

    This post made me smile because my husband knows that getting me flowers for Valentine’s Day is just about the worst thing he could do. I abhor the mark-ups for such holidays and would rather get them at a random time.

  4. 4. neimanmarxist on September 3rd, 2008

    i think it’s also worth mentioning that a joint venture to be frugal ensures couples that it is their bond- and not their mutual appreciation of oysters or the latest from Polo Ralph Lauren- that is contributing to their joy and satisfaction.

  5. 5. Amanda on September 3rd, 2008

    Haha, you must be teasing, Frugal Dad! It is totally a turn on when my husband saves money. Coins in our money savvy pig? Oh, baby! A renewed CD with a higher interest rate? Leave us alone for hours! ;)

    I’m just being silly, but in all seriousness, I would so much rather have a frugal, well thought out gift like what your wife did, then have either one of us spend tons of money on the other.

  6. 6. Mindi on September 3rd, 2008

    I can’t keep my husband off of me since I became more frugal. Then again, he wasn’t exactly leaving me alone before that either!

  7. 7. frugal fergie on September 3rd, 2008

    That’s a really special and creative gift idea. If you don’t mind, I may just have to borrow it for my boyfriend… :)

  8. 8. Frugal Dad on September 3rd, 2008
    @Frugal Fergie: On behalf of my wife, I’d say I’m sure she wouldn’t mind you reusing the idea. It was such a special gift, and I think your boyfriend will cherish it as well (if he doesn’t, he may not be a “keeper!”).
  9. 9. Matt on September 3rd, 2008

    Great article! I think that my girlfriend and I are now on the same page and we are both excited about living frugally.

    She also got me a nice frugal gift for Valentine’s day this past year by making me a necklace. She loves beading and managed to pull together a simple masculine necklace just my style. I can totally relate to appreciating the amount of thought that goes into a gift over how much it costs.

  10. 10. Amiyrah on September 3rd, 2008

    hubby and I were just discussing this the other day. He’s the only one in his shop who has a wife that makes his lunch every day and doesn’t force him to buy lunch from fast food places. Every guy in his shop totally envies him. they also whine about how their wives spend up their checks as soon as they get them and expected it to be even worse for Hubby, since he’s the new guy and gets paid lower than everyone else. When he said that his wife hardly touches his check and when she does, its to stockpile groceries for the next few weeks, they were in shock. He also told them that sometimes stores like CVS and Walgreens pay ME to take things out of their stores. He said the fact that he knew he had “the best wife” out of the other wives really attracted him to me all over again lol. They say money is attractive and I guess not using it so much is an attraction too.

  11. 11. Kathy on September 3rd, 2008

    For my husbands birthday this past summer I surprised him by painting his office in our home- with free paint!. I got free paint at the local recycling center. You can get lots of colors of paint there- and this was a brand new can of paint in just the color that suits my husband. What a nice gift for him and he really appreciated it! We also got some durable outdoor paint and enjoyed our Labor Day painting the deck for free!

  12. 12. JD on September 4th, 2008

    To me a frugality in a girl is a VERY attractive quality. I am in my late 20s and looking to settle down soon, I make a mid-six figure income but like to SAVE most of it. I still live well but live like someone who is making a fraction of what I make. One of my concerns is that the partner I find have the same attitudes about money that I have. I like to splurge at times, particularly when I travel which is frequently. I’ll stay at the top hotels and stuff. And I like to eat out at different restaurants both cheap and expensive whether I am traveling or at home. But that is about it, I guess you can say my indulgences are more on “experience” type of things than material things. Looking at the wives of some of my friends and colleagues I worry that I will end up like that, where they have wives who shop uncontrollably and are adamant about living the “rich” lifestyle. I don’t care for that stuff, to me the greatest luxury is knowing I have a huge savings/portfolio and don’t need to worry about affording my lifestyle.

  13. 13. Squawkfox on September 4th, 2008

    My hubby doesn’t really get turned on with frugality. I sure do though. So to turn on my light, hubby goes frugal. He wins. I win. Yay.

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  15. 15. Sara at On Simplicity on September 5th, 2008

    Oh, this is so true for me and the spouse. We were both looking for someone we could build a life with, not just good-looking wallpaper. No matter how much we clicked, I know he wouldn’t have given me the time of day if he thought I expected him to shower me with gifts, and vice versa.

    In other words, I had him at “fully funding my 401k for the year.”

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