When Clutter Kills: Man Trapped By His Own Pile Of Junk And Dies

It is true there are various degrees of hoarding. Some may have a shoe fettish with a closet big enough to make Imelda Marcos jealous. Others may hoard parts and scraps and fill entire warehouses with their junk. But it is a serious sign of trouble when you have so much stuff in your home that you have to burrow tunnels through it to make your way from room to room.

That’s exactly what one U.K. man did for over ten years. Gordon Stewart, 74, was found dead in his home last Friday after apparently becoming lost in his own maze of junk and died of dehydration. Without knowing more about Mr. Gordon, other than what is told in the original story at The Sun, it is hard to know why Gordon accumulated stuff with such intensity. It is not clear what his motivations were–environmental, economic, or just plain eccentric. Either way, it was a sad end.

What Motivates People To Become Hoarders?

For some, hoarding is the symptom of some deeper psychological problem such as obsessive-compulsive disorder, or depression. Others turn to hoarding because of an anxiety that things may be needed in the future, but when the time comes they will lack the financial resources to acquire them. And then there are those who have deep sentimental attachment to things and simply can’t bear to part with them.

Aside from the extreme example of Mr. Gordon’s demise, there are plenty of other health reasons to avoid hoarding. Obviously, there are physical dangers including trips and falls, particularly dangerous to the elderly. There are more hidden dangers such as mildew, dust and rodent infestations to contend with.

A Fine Line Between Stockpiling and Hoarding

For a brief time I was enamored with coupon clipping and stockpiling. I even joined a site called GroceryGame.com where people participated in forums to show off their impressive stockpiles of 37 tubes of Crest toothpaste, 12 boxes of Cheez-Its, etc. I was impressed, and thought the idea of stockpiling household sale items, particularly things like cleaners, non-perishables and toiletries, made a lot of sense. After all, these were the days when food inflation was the scare of the season. I thought stocking up now would save us from spending more money for the same item down the line.

What I discovered was that the line between stockpiling and hoarding blurs pretty quickly. After all, how many $1.49 toilet bowl cleaners does one family really need? I dedicated an entire shelving unit in our garage to our stockpile, and soon it was taking over an adjacent shelf.

Inside the house we used two metal racks to hold our food finds, but we were never good at rotating stock and lost a few items to expiration. We concluded that the mental energy required to manage all this stuff was not worth the cost savings to acquire it. In the future if we needed a can of cream of mushroom soup we would go buy one (or two or three–still good to have a backup of some things). If we happen to have a coupon and can save a little extra, great. If not, we don’t sweat it. We control our stuff, and we don’t let it control us.

Off-Price Retailers Offer Lower Prices On Name Brand Items

My wife and I received a T.J. Maxx gift card this Christmas from someone appealing to our frugal side.  I admit, I haven’t been to a T.J. Maxx store in a long time, but thoroughly enjoyed browsing the aisles with my wife last Saturday.  One of the things that struck me was the number of name-brand items on sale at clearance prices.  Not fully understanding the store’s off-price strategy I was off to learn more.

Off-Price Retailers

First, a little history on the industry straight from the T.J. Maxx website:

Off-price retailing grew in the recession of the mid-’70s when consumers had limited discretionary income.  Consumers wanted to save money without sacrificing quality and fashion.  Shopping “off-price” provided the perfect solution.  Through the years, the off-price industry has continued to grow.  The recession of the early ’90s reinforced consumers’ value-oriented; mentality and heightened the demand for quality fashions at reasonable prices.

Sound familiar?  If the blurb on their website had not reference the recessionary times of the mid-’70s and early-’90s I would have though they were describing the consumer sentiment of today.  After all, many folks are hunting bargains without sacrificing quality.  To me, that is the mantra of the frugal shopper.

Our Finds

The hardest part of spending money with a gift card is trying to decide what to buy and stay within your budgeted amount.  Our gift card was for $25.00, which normally wouldn’t buy much, but as we shopped the items at our local T.J. Maxx store we were able to find three much-needed household items to toss in our shopping cart.

19-piece ultimate measuring set.  Just like the label says, this is the “ultimate measuring set.”  Up to now we’ve collected a mix-matched set of measuring spoons and cups of various sizes, colors and brands.  Now we have a complete, matching set and can retire our current measuring devices to back-up duty.

Shower curtain 3-pack.  My son loves to play “splash the parent” in the bath tub, so we’ve employed a plastic shower curtain liner for some time to protect us (and the bathroom floor). Unfortunately, these things tend to collect mildew pretty quickly, and there are only so many times you can clean with vinegar before they need replacing.

8-piece prep bowls with lids.  My wife enjoys watching the occasional cooking show, and is always envious of the little glass prep bowls everyone uses to separate their spices and various ingredients.  Well, now she has her own!  We have also discovered these are the perfect size for pouring up a little homemade honey mustard or similar sauce for dipping meats and veggies.

We took home all three items for just over $25.00 (the difference was less than a dollar). It felt good to pick up three things we needed, but had put off purchasing because of their expense, even in discount stores.  We didn’t even make it to the racks of discounted, name brand clothing, but plan to as the seasons change and the kids need spring and summer clothing.  From now on, we’ll check off-price retailers before stepping foot in a mall!

Homemade Laundry Detergent Not For Us

Over the years I’ve won a few battles on the frugal front, but I have lost nearly as many as I’ve won.  One idea that I can’t sell my wife (or myself) on is making our own homemade laundry detergent. According to various recipes out there for homemade laundry detergent I can probably get the costs down below what we spend for the family size containers of Tide at Sam’s Club. But is it really worth the few dollars saved?

Middle-of-the-Road Frugalist

Like anything else, frugality has opposite extremes.  There are those that rinse Ziploc bags, reuse aluminum foil, make their own homemade laundry detergent, and only buy things for which they have a coupon.  I’ve done a few of these things at some point, but none of them with any real consistency.  I applaud those who do, but it just isn’t for us.

In the past I’ve written about people who will live on Ramen noodles for weeks and then buy something completely unnecessary like a new GPS unit or an iPhone.  There’s nothing wrong with these particular items if you enjoy that sort of thing, but if those who covet them simply ate regular meals and passed on a few goodies they could live a much more balanced life.  That balance is really at the heart of this entire discussion about money.

A Balancing Act

While we do collect a few coupons, we are not obsessive.  We prefer to wash our clothes in store-bought detergent.  We will never buy cheap paper products–paper towels, toilet paper, etc. (Yes, I know the 1-ply stuff is cheaper, but seriously, you have to use twice as much and…okay, this is getting a little too personal!).  As I was saying, there are a few things we simply are not willing to give up, or scale back on, and we are blessed to be able to make those choices.

Over the last few days I’ve spent a good deal of time reflecting on past purchase decisions that I have regretted, or lamented about the trapped feeling brought on by debt, but I don’t want to give the impression that I am miserable.  To the contrary, I am quite happy.  The last thing I want to do is create a complete anti-consumer attitude here at Frugal Dad.  I don’t advocate becoming a hermit and only coming out of your cave when there’s a sale on your favorite brand of toothpaste.  After all, life is to be enjoyed.

I wonder how many people out there use frugality as a front for a perpetual poor attitude.  It is true that some people are simply afraid of success, so they consciously make bad decisions to purposefully repel success.  At least some of those people probably call themselves frugal as justification for never having any money to spend.  I don’t want that to be you.  Don’t be afraid of success.  Be frugal, but enjoy this life we’ve been blessed with.  Be frugal to build wealth so you can use it to brighten the lives of others.

If you are like me and refuse to make your own homemade laundry detergent, perhaps you can hang a clothesline to dry your clothes as another way to save money doing laundry.  Maybe your hang up is health food–you simply refuse to purchase cheap, processed junk from the supermarket.  That’s perfectly fine, and not a bad idea, but give up soft drinks or alcohol or some other culinary indulgence to balance out the costs of food.  Life is about making choices, and finding the right balance for you and yours.

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The Life Cycle Of A Purchase – From Desired Object To Tossed Clutter

RDS of SmartFinancialValues.com left an intriguing comment in response to a recent weekend post asking readers if they would be willing to sell all material possessions to become debt free.  RDS mentions that when it comes to their possessions “the transformation from desired, valued item to clutter happens very suddenly.”  It forced me to reflect on the life cycle of a few of my own purchases in the past, and how I feel towards those items today.

The Object of My Desire

I had it bad.  I looked at pictures of her in magazines, videos online, and often rode by during lunch breaks just to catch a glimpse of her. Her name was Silverado, as in a Chevy Silverado.  After a teenage obsession with wanting a car I quickly decided I needed a truck.  And not just any truck; I wanted a Chevy truck.  One with four doors and a big cab with a comfy interior, but enough power to haul whatever I wanted to wherever I needed.

This truck fever stayed with me through the early years of marriage, though I resisted the temptation to buy. That was until, in a moment of weakness, I stopped at the car lot and test drove the truck model I had been watching for all those years.  This particular truck was sporty–shiny black exterior with tan leather seats and a chrome sports package.  It also had a dual exhaust which gave the engine a throaty sound on acceleration.  I was in love.

So I pulled the trigger and financed the truck, ignoring the little voice in the back of my head telling me to walk away.  I told myself I could afford the $350 a month payments, and the increased insurance premium.  After all, I worked hard.

For those first few days and weeks I thoroughly enjoyed that truck.  I looked for excuses to drive places.  But after a few months the payments started to catch up with me.  Our insurance premium renewed and I saw a noticeable increase when projected over the full six months.  The thing was pretty, but it did use up gas, and because I was doing more “pleasure driving” I burned even more of it.

We still had some debt hanging around from my journey to finish school.  My wife was staying home with both of our kids.  In what now seems like an overnight epiphany the shine wore off that truck.  I sold it two weeks from the time I decided I wanted to sell it, and felt only a slight twinge as the new owners backed out of my driveway on a Saturday morning.

The Life Cycle Of A Purchase

What happened with my truck inevitably happens to all of our purchases.  The shine begins to fade, our enjoyment of them lessens over time, and eventually they become more of a burden than they are worth.  Call it what you want–the law of diminished returns, buyer’s remorse–the only variable in the equation is time.

Occasionally things retain sentimental value long after the useful life is lived up, and we hang onto them for posterity, knowing that future generations of family may have some interest in our heirloom.  However, given enough time all of our prized possessions wind up in the landfill next to a forty year-old styrofoam cup.

Does knowing this ahead of time keep us from buying too many things now?  Of course not, else all the people who say “You can’t take it with you” wouldn’t have to remind us.  That still doesn’t mean that things cannot be enjoyed while we are here.  It simply means that objects of our desire are just that, objects.  Their only value is the one we assign to it, not what a marketer has priced it to be.  Try to focus your life energy on acquiring only things that have a lot of value to you, not someone else.  Through this lens, things like paying premiums for a name brand, or buying just to impress others will seem like a monumental waste.

Why Do You Hate Debt?

A couple weeks ago I asked Twitter followers a question that generated quite a few responses:  “Why do you hate debt, in five words or less?”  Five words was probably too strict, but I had some great responses.  I’ve shared a few of my favorites below.  Feel free to add yours in the comments, and this time it doesn’t have to be limited to five words.  Thanks to all those who participated.

Why do you hate debt?

“It robs my children.” by DoodlesPlace

“Debt turns working into bondage.” by Heather

“It’s like being in prison.”  by uneekdolldesign

“Debt fuels anxiety; strangles.”   by Momsatwork

“It weighs down your potential.” by bargainr

“Limits freedom, binds to past.” by NCN

“It limits our possible futures.” by Mrs. Micah

“Debt makes everything harder.” by thewriterscoin

“Debt = An immortal money-sucking leech” by prosperousfool

“Debt delays one’s financial freedom.” by LazyManAndMoney

“Anchor weighing you down.” by glblguy

“Debt harbors dependence upon others.” by jakematic

“Debt makes your decisions.” by TheHappyRock

“Takes the freedom outta life!” by by dreamingescape

“Compound interest works against you.” by ericabiz

“Debt kills your dreams.” by Green_Panda

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