[...] It seemed the cover story of every major media publication featured some variation of “ways to save money” or “ways to survive the recession,” or proclaimed the reemergence of [...]

I really was taken aback by the sit all day bit.

Length of post is not related to how serious my response is.

I don’t know where you all live, but I live in a major U.S. city with tourism as a key component even in residential areas.

Real estate is extraordinarily expensive and we lose good shops of all types all the time due to rent increases. Turnover is critical to making money and staying in business.

So, yea, I feel strongly that people should not take up space in a retail shop (not a mall) if not a real customer.

And as for being asked to leave. That will rarely if ever happen. Owners who are not always on property aren’t big on doing it, and the workers certainly aren’t. (And new customers, who don’t have any idea how long someone has been there, probably won’t do it.)

What goes on elsewhere in the country and is acceptable, I would not know. I do know what does not work here in our metropolis.

FYI: There are quite a few open spaces, public areas in and outdoors that are perfect to go and sit as long as you like.

it’s not as if you do not have options.

Frankly, it’s this attitude about so-called “frugal” types that makes them so offputting to many (clearly not the folks here)others.

As for a free lunch at costco…I’m pretty sure if you’re at costco, you didn’t go just to get free samples. You probably bought something on your visits otherwise you wouldn’t be a member (which costs $).

As for a grandma taking an entire family reunion group to a local grocery store for a free lunch. I’m not even going to comment.

Because to me, YOU must be kidding.

It’s one thing to enjoy free samples when you are shopping, it’s another, again, to just take for the sake of taking.

And by the way, if you’re homeless, can’t afford food…and you are doing this. That’s another story entirely. That’s sheer need. But you don’t see homeless people doing this (usually because they are shooed out of stores or not let in).

Frugal Dad
You may have meant it as lighthearted, but to me, it was just that you didn’t even think about it till someone commented negatively.

And it’s NOT the same as using a fast food bathroom when you stop while driving. Not by a longshot.

FYI: Most places have public bathrooms on the drives we’ve taken. So you don’t even need to go into a retail shop.

My grandma once took the entire family during a family reunion to a local grocery store for lunch. I’ve known more that one person who has had a free lunch at Costco on sample Saturday.

For treating the place as if it was your personal lounge?

That’s not cheap. It’s way beyond cheap. That’s what I call abusive for lack of a better word.

Those places are not the library or other public venue, where you could also probably park yourself for free and get WiFi.

Regardless of whether the place was full or not (and if it was full at certain points when you were there, shame on you for taking up a seat from an actual patron), it’s not a public venue. They have overhead and your one bottle of water for an all-day visit cause you clearly wanted to get out of the house…that’s just inconsiderate, rude and outrageous.

I’m totally turned off by your behavior and worse that you seem proud of it (you shared this story as an example so you must be OK with it).

This is NOT constructive frugality. It’s one thing to go someplace for even an hour or two with a bottle of water or cup of coffee. But all day? Hello. You’re old enough to know when you are in essence sponging off a business’ good will.

Now, if you happen, during the year to heavily patronize this place, then MAYBE this is OK. Maybe. Because you are offsetting it by other purchases. But I rather doubt this is the case.

I don’t own a store and I rarely if ever go to coffee spots anymore unless I’m meeting someone else. (Not only do I not want to spend the money but I hate the coffee in most of these places. And the food choices are usually pretty bad, regardless of the price.)

But as a small-biz owner, I’m pretty outraged by your thoughtlessness, greed (yea, it’s a form of greed)and generally poor behavior.

This is the reason that so many people who say they are frugal are really just plain old cheap–and cheap at the advantage and good will of others.

Your story reminds me of people who talk about how much money they save on food because they go to events where everyone else brings something, but, wait for it, they don’t bring anything.

Or people who just seek out events with free food and then go (or worse, sneak in if uninvited) to get free stuff.

Just because a chair is open doesn’t mean you, as basically a non-patron, get to occupy it for a full day.

This story to me is a real turn-off about your behavior and choices.

By the way, your wife was kind in her labeling you.

And the story is not about fasting. It’s about inappropriate behavior.

If you wanted to fast, you could fast at home.

Why should a retailer pay for space so YOU can have a hideaway when you don’t want to work at home? Come on…

I too cut my hair and have for a few months now. I got sick of all the money and tipping for hair I never really cared for. Now I cut it how I want. Everyone I know has been asking me where I got my cute haircut from LOL!

If I can I do research and fix anything and everything I can around the house. I have always been like that and love being frugal.

But to each his own. I for one value free time for reflection and personal growth over conspicuous consumption, and act accordingly.

Though I must admit misleading family members about what they are eating rubs me the wrong way, especially for spouses and older children. Thinking you’re “saving them the worry” or “afraid they won’t like it” is a dangerous path to be going down.

In general, cut any expense you don’t need and don’t want. You’ll never miss them. Think you don’t buy things in that category? Think harder; I know I make this mistake time after time.