Comments on: Newly Married? Here Are Some Financial Changes to Make http://frugaldad.com/2010/02/26/newly-married-heres-what-you-need-to-change-financially/ Money Saving Insights: Coupons, Smart Spending and Promotional Codes Mon, 13 Feb 2012 05:38:35 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.2.1 By: Bonnie http://frugaldad.com/2010/02/26/newly-married-heres-what-you-need-to-change-financially/#comment-38795 Bonnie Sun, 07 Mar 2010 07:17:41 +0000 http://frugaldad.com/?p=4824#comment-38795 Adam, you covered all the important points. Since you're not a woman, though, you missed all the name change hassle. @#2Hannah - I got married a year ago and it took several months to complete all the paperwork to change all my accounts (granted, I'm a working professional in my early thirties, so it would've been much easier were I fresh out of college). First, you have to wait until you have your certified marriage certificate, then you have to change your name with Social Security. Once you have your new SS card, you can update your driver's license. Once you have that, you can update all your other accounts - bank checking/savings, credit cards, other loans, Paypal, passport, professional licenses, airline mileage, hotel rewards, Amazon express checkout (you get the point). It's a massive undertaking, but better done shortly after getting married than waiting until you have your first child. @Krista - I completely agree w/ Adam. It's best to discuss finances before you're married, but to wait until after to actually combine accounts. Common law marriage may be legal in Canada and Australia, but here in the U.S. it depends on the laws of your state. For example, I live in a state where there is no common law marriage. Adam, you covered all the important points. Since you’re not a woman, though, you missed all the name change hassle. @#2Hannah – I got married a year ago and it took several months to complete all the paperwork to change all my accounts (granted, I’m a working professional in my early thirties, so it would’ve been much easier were I fresh out of college). First, you have to wait until you have your certified marriage certificate, then you have to change your name with Social Security. Once you have your new SS card, you can update your driver’s license. Once you have that, you can update all your other accounts – bank checking/savings, credit cards, other loans, Paypal, passport, professional licenses, airline mileage, hotel rewards, Amazon express checkout (you get the point). It’s a massive undertaking, but better done shortly after getting married than waiting until you have your first child.

@Krista – I completely agree w/ Adam. It’s best to discuss finances before you’re married, but to wait until after to actually combine accounts. Common law marriage may be legal in Canada and Australia, but here in the U.S. it depends on the laws of your state. For example, I live in a state where there is no common law marriage.

]]> By: Financial Samurai http://frugaldad.com/2010/02/26/newly-married-heres-what-you-need-to-change-financially/#comment-38572 Financial Samurai Mon, 01 Mar 2010 08:32:42 +0000 http://frugaldad.com/?p=4824#comment-38572 Good stuff Adam. Thanks for this. Definitely worth having that TALK! Good stuff Adam. Thanks for this. Definitely worth having that TALK!

]]> By: Jenn http://frugaldad.com/2010/02/26/newly-married-heres-what-you-need-to-change-financially/#comment-38560 Jenn Sun, 28 Feb 2010 20:36:21 +0000 http://frugaldad.com/?p=4824#comment-38560 We've always combined the cash, but we have friends who contribute to a joint account used to pay the bills. I know the people who keep it separate must have their reasons, but somehow separate=hidden in my mind. There's nothing we spend money on that isn't out in the open so why would it need to come from separate accounts? The only reasons that come to mind for separate accounts are either that you don't want to have to justify some of the things you are spending on, or you make the higher salary and feel that anything you earn above your share of common expenses is yours to spend. Neither seems like a good basis for a long and healthy marriage. I find the biggest advantage of combining everything is first of all the simplicity of maintaining only one spreadsheet to plan, balance and track everything. Secondly, every week once I've updated all the actual expenses against the planned spending, I skim off all the excess and make an extra payment on the mortgage payment or to retirement savings. Because all the excess accumulates in one account it's easier to identify and as a result we do something with it virtually every week. Smaller amounts accumulating in separate accounts might not seem worth dealing with. The sooner the extra gets moved to the mortgage or retirements accounts the sooner it has an impact. We’ve always combined the cash, but we have friends who contribute to a joint account used to pay the bills. I know the people who keep it separate must have their reasons, but somehow separate=hidden in my mind. There’s nothing we spend money on that isn’t out in the open so why would it need to come from separate accounts? The only reasons that come to mind for separate accounts are either that you don’t want to have to justify some of the things you are spending on, or you make the higher salary and feel that anything you earn above your share of common expenses is yours to spend. Neither seems like a good basis for a long and healthy marriage.

I find the biggest advantage of combining everything is first of all the simplicity of maintaining only one spreadsheet to plan, balance and track everything. Secondly, every week once I’ve updated all the actual expenses against the planned spending, I skim off all the excess and make an extra payment on the mortgage payment or to retirement savings. Because all the excess accumulates in one account it’s easier to identify and as a result we do something with it virtually every week. Smaller amounts accumulating in separate accounts might not seem worth dealing with. The sooner the extra gets moved to the mortgage or retirements accounts the sooner it has an impact.

]]> By: Mike http://frugaldad.com/2010/02/26/newly-married-heres-what-you-need-to-change-financially/#comment-38558 Mike Sun, 28 Feb 2010 13:32:59 +0000 http://frugaldad.com/?p=4824#comment-38558 I vote to combine the money if you are married. It is a demonstration of trust. Marriage isn't about individuals but about a team. Managing the household's income and expenses should be as well. If someone needs a thing that is just theirs, separate from the marriage, how about hobby that can save money around the house? I vote to combine the money if you are married. It is a demonstration of trust. Marriage isn’t about individuals but about a team. Managing the household’s income and expenses should be as well.

If someone needs a thing that is just theirs, separate from the marriage, how about hobby that can save money around the house?

]]> By: Joseph | kickdebtoff http://frugaldad.com/2010/02/26/newly-married-heres-what-you-need-to-change-financially/#comment-38540 Joseph | kickdebtoff Sat, 27 Feb 2010 14:15:56 +0000 http://frugaldad.com/?p=4824#comment-38540 Great comments, We have been married since August 2008, and my understanding going in which still hold is that you just do not marry the person, you marry their money, weaknesses and strength. We had a financial pre-marital counseling and we understood where we were financially (deep in debt),but we decided from the word go that we will be using joint account. we merged our cash but did not close individual accounts that we had.. those accounts are mostly dormant but once in a while we put each of our allowances in those accounts. When i was reading about the will.. i found out that if one spouse dies and they have not spelled out those individual accounts it goes to probate and it can be a long process to have the funds released. Great comments,
We have been married since August 2008, and my understanding going in which still hold is that you just do not marry the person, you marry their money, weaknesses and strength.
We had a financial pre-marital counseling and we understood where we were financially (deep in debt),but we decided from the word go that we will be using joint account. we merged our cash but did not close individual accounts that we had.. those accounts are mostly dormant but once in a while we put each of our allowances in those accounts.
When i was reading about the will.. i found out that if one spouse dies and they have not spelled out those individual accounts it goes to probate and it can be a long process to have the funds released.

]]> By: Money Reasons http://frugaldad.com/2010/02/26/newly-married-heres-what-you-need-to-change-financially/#comment-38537 Money Reasons Sat, 27 Feb 2010 12:07:22 +0000 http://frugaldad.com/?p=4824#comment-38537 I agree with everything, except the "Combine the Cash". It's nice to have some money seperate from your spouse, especially if you had it before the marriage. That said, we do have joint accounts where we have the vast (or at least I wish it was vast) majority of our money in. IMHO, It's a personal choice, either way is okay... I agree with everything, except the “Combine the Cash”.

It’s nice to have some money seperate from your spouse, especially if you had it before the marriage.

That said, we do have joint accounts where we have the vast (or at least I wish it was vast) majority of our money in.

IMHO, It’s a personal choice, either way is okay…

]]> By: sherry http://frugaldad.com/2010/02/26/newly-married-heres-what-you-need-to-change-financially/#comment-38533 sherry Sat, 27 Feb 2010 02:51:00 +0000 http://frugaldad.com/?p=4824#comment-38533 This is a great plan, especially about the part on insurance. Being married does save big bucks in that area. But the money seems to be a sensitive issue and there may arise some problems in the future. It would be great if you would write a post or two on how you overcome those challenges (if you ever have any because almost nothing ever go according to plans.) This is a great plan, especially about the part on insurance. Being married does save big bucks in that area. But the money seems to be a sensitive issue and there may arise some problems in the future. It would be great if you would write a post or two on how you overcome those challenges (if you ever have any because almost nothing ever go according to plans.)

]]> By: Maya http://frugaldad.com/2010/02/26/newly-married-heres-what-you-need-to-change-financially/#comment-38532 Maya Sat, 27 Feb 2010 01:22:41 +0000 http://frugaldad.com/?p=4824#comment-38532 I would recommend that couple open the joint account before the wedding, even if they don't put money into it yet. My husband and I didn't do this and we had a very hard time depositing the checks that we received. The checks were writen to him, to me with my maiden name, to me with my presumed maried name (which was extra challenging since I didn't change my name), and a variety of other combinations. In short, to deposit the checks into my checking account we had to stand at the teller counter, speak to 3 tellers and the manager, fingerprint my husband, and do some extra signatures. They told us that if we had already opened an account with both names on it, we would have been able to deposit all of the checks with no problem. I would recommend that couple open the joint account before the wedding, even if they don’t put money into it yet. My husband and I didn’t do this and we had a very hard time depositing the checks that we received. The checks were writen to him, to me with my maiden name, to me with my presumed maried name (which was extra challenging since I didn’t change my name), and a variety of other combinations. In short, to deposit the checks into my checking account we had to stand at the teller counter, speak to 3 tellers and the manager, fingerprint my husband, and do some extra signatures. They told us that if we had already opened an account with both names on it, we would have been able to deposit all of the checks with no problem.

]]> By: Jenn http://frugaldad.com/2010/02/26/newly-married-heres-what-you-need-to-change-financially/#comment-38526 Jenn Fri, 26 Feb 2010 21:04:50 +0000 http://frugaldad.com/?p=4824#comment-38526 If you're changing your name, you'll need your credit and debit cards reissued. Keep in mind you may be without cards for a few weeks if they disable the old ones while you wait for the new ones. I did the name change twice and it was a pain both times. A few weeks before our wedding my husband casually asked what paper work was going to be required to change my name. Until that moment we had never discussed it. I wasn't planning to change my name any more than I was planning to ask him to change his. He just assumed I would and I just assumed I wouldn't. Long story short I changed my name since it seemed so important to him at the time. Two years later that rushed decision still wasn't sitting right with me and I changed it back. Did the whole process again just to undo everything and go back to my own name. 25yrs later and I still use my own name, the kids have his last name, and all's well. The up side is that people from highschool and university still call me out of the blue because I'm one of the few women they can find because I use my real name. Using my husband's name is really just a social tradition and not a legal change. Just show your marriage certificate at the license bureau and get a new drivers license and car registration. Fax it to the CC company and get a card in a new name. To switch back I just showed my birth certificate to prove who I really was. As my lawyer once put it, you are the name on your birth certificate, everything else is just formalities. In Quebec you have to do a legal name change to use your husband's last name so most women there don't change their names. Using your husband's name without doing the legal paperwork amounts to committing identity fraud. If you’re changing your name, you’ll need your credit and debit cards reissued. Keep in mind you may be without cards for a few weeks if they disable the old ones while you wait for the new ones.

I did the name change twice and it was a pain both times. A few weeks before our wedding my husband casually asked what paper work was going to be required to change my name. Until that moment we had never discussed it. I wasn’t planning to change my name any more than I was planning to ask him to change his. He just assumed I would and I just assumed I wouldn’t. Long story short I changed my name since it seemed so important to him at the time. Two years later that rushed decision still wasn’t sitting right with me and I changed it back. Did the whole process again just to undo everything and go back to my own name. 25yrs later and I still use my own name, the kids have his last name, and all’s well. The up side is that people from highschool and university still call me out of the blue because I’m one of the few women they can find because I use my real name. Using my husband’s name is really just a social tradition and not a legal change. Just show your marriage certificate at the license bureau and get a new drivers license and car registration. Fax it to the CC company and get a card in a new name. To switch back I just showed my birth certificate to prove who I really was. As my lawyer once put it, you are the name on your birth certificate, everything else is just formalities.
In Quebec you have to do a legal name change to use your husband’s last name so most women there don’t change their names. Using your husband’s name without doing the legal paperwork amounts to committing identity fraud.

]]> By: Erica Douglass http://frugaldad.com/2010/02/26/newly-married-heres-what-you-need-to-change-financially/#comment-38521 Erica Douglass Fri, 26 Feb 2010 17:49:50 +0000 http://frugaldad.com/?p=4824#comment-38521 Talking to HR and combining insurance can be done before you are married in many cases--as long as you are living together. Richard and I have been living together for nearly 3 years and we combined car/renter's insurance, cell phone plans (that's a huge one, too), and health insurance (I'm covered under his work account.) For the health insurance, in CA, you'll have to sign an affidavit of domestic partnership and get it notarized. This wasn't a big deal--notarizing 2 signatures is $20--and it means cheaper health insurance than I would get alone. Some of these you might not want to do right away, especially if you haven't been in the relationship for a long time. But once you've been in the relationship 6-8 months, and if you're living together at that point, it's worth it. Sharing living expenses is also nice, and saves on commuting back and forth. :) -Erica Talking to HR and combining insurance can be done before you are married in many cases–as long as you are living together. Richard and I have been living together for nearly 3 years and we combined car/renter’s insurance, cell phone plans (that’s a huge one, too), and health insurance (I’m covered under his work account.)

For the health insurance, in CA, you’ll have to sign an affidavit of domestic partnership and get it notarized. This wasn’t a big deal–notarizing 2 signatures is $20–and it means cheaper health insurance than I would get alone.

Some of these you might not want to do right away, especially if you haven’t been in the relationship for a long time. But once you’ve been in the relationship 6-8 months, and if you’re living together at that point, it’s worth it.

Sharing living expenses is also nice, and saves on commuting back and forth. :)

-Erica

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