Photo by crazytales562

Here lately I’ve been in a reflective mood.  Not sure why.  Maybe it’s because another school year is rolling around and my kids are growing up too fast.  Maybe it’s because my 31st birthday is right around the corner and I’ll officially be in my “thirties.”  Whatever the reason, I’ve been thinking about the past a lot.  Not necessarily dwelling on it, but thinking about how I got to where I am today.

My very first credit card purchase was a Sony Playstation.  I was a sophomore in college and had just received a brand new, shiny credit card with a whopping $500 credit limit compliments of Discover Card (trading a credit card application for a t-shirt was my first really dumb move).  At the time, Playstations were going for about $199, plus games, and I even tossed in an extra controller for my roommate.  I think I charged around $300 in that first transaction.  I’d pay it off over time.  Well, that was the only part of this plan I had right.  I would pay it off over time - years!

Young and Dumb

During my 20’s I was mostly “young and dumb,” especially when it came to money.  It’s not that I was downright irresponsible with money, but I just wasn’t making conscious decisions about my spending. For most of my 20’s I lived with a “monthly payment” mentality where I justified financing my lifestyle because I could afford the payments.  Looking back, this was an incredibly immature way of looking at finances.  I even remember being about 22 years old and pining for a new car.  My low status on the career totem pole meant the purchase consumed a large percentage of my annual salary–but that’s okay, I could afford the payment.  And then something happened and I was instantly cured of car fever, gadget envy, and all the other consumer cravings that had caused me problems up to that point.

Cars are Just Hunks of Metal Riding on Four Pieces of Rubber

I’ve never really been a car guy.  I didn’t grow up around car restorations, or mechanics, and my grandfather owned exactly two vehicles in 34 years.  But I did like cars, and when I was a teenager I wanted a “cool car.”  I didn’t get one, but I did inherit my grandmother’s car which was in pristine condition, mechanically.  In fact, I wish I still had that car!  When I finished college I needed a new car, because after all, I was working and earning a salary and I “deserved” it.  I leased an SUV, and several years later traded it in on a newer, used Chevy Silverado.  Oh, how I loved that truck–sport trim package, V-8, ice-cold air, CD player, great sound system, etc, etc.  It also came with a new monthly payment, and an increase to my insurance premium.  For a few months I drove that truck and loved it.  My grandfather had offered his old truck to drive, but I wanted a “cool truck.”

One day, after writing out the check for the monthly payment, and the increased monthly insurance premium, something hit me like a ton of bricks.  I sat there watching my kids play in our backyard, and then looked over at that “new” truck.  How much could their futures be improved by taking this $400 a month and applying it to our other debts, and then saving it for their future education?  How could I be so selfish.

A Cure to Car Fever

I got in my truck and drove to an office supply store, picked up a “For Sale” sign, and listed it for sale in our credit union bulletin the next day.  Two weeks later I got a call.  The prospective buyer loved the truck, offered what I was asking and left to arrange financing.  That Saturday morning he and his wife drove over to pick it up.  We exchanged a cashier’s check, and a bill of sale, and away they went.  As I stood there in the driveway watching my “dream truck” drive away I was forever cured of car fever.  It was if I could literally feel the transfer of the burden of car debt move from me to the new buyer–poor guy.

That was about four years ago.  I’ve been driving my grandfather’s “old” truck ever since that Saturday morning.  I will continue to drive it as long as it runs.  I’ve adopted a utilitarian view on automobiles (and other things).  They are literally hunks of metal pieced together, set on four tires, and sold to us for the purpose of transportation.  Cars don’t define our social status, and are horrible indicators of wealth.  Never again will I fall victim to worrying about what others think, or what marketers try to convince me to think.

Do you know someone who is “perpetual poor?” You know the type - constantly complaining, poor-mouthing, griping about the price of everything and jealous of everything others have. I think we all know at least one or two of those types. I’ve had the displeasure of knowing many, and over time I have heard my share of sob stories related to their personal finances. I recognize that some people are generally down on their luck, or going through a rough patch. Maybe they have faced a debilitating illness, or a job layoff, or some other tragic event that has derailed them from leading successful, productive lives. Those are not the people I am referring to when I attach the label “perpetual poor.”

Perpetual poor people have a language of their own - a way of speaking that almost immediately identifies them as members of this class. When kids are young and they use an inappropriate word parents remind them to “watch their language.” As adults we still need an occasional reminder when we utter a financial expletive. I recognize that the words that follow will likely step on some toes, so put on a pair of steel-toe boots and read on.

“The poor man just can’t get ahead”

Quite possibly my all-time favorite statement of those with a poor attitude. This one is often muttered by someone insecure in their own abilities, and lacking any aspiration to improve their lot in life. They go around knocking “rich” people, minimizing their efforts by insinuating that they are rich because they are lucky, or because their parents were rich. In some cases, both may be true, but the average millionaire in America started with nothing and built a successful career through hard work, dedication and a never-ending willingness to acquire new knowledge. Remember, there are no financial Cinderellas.

How to identify members of this group:

• Can recite the last five winners of American Idle (that’s not a typo) from memory
• Haven’ t picked up a book since high school
• Never stretched to learn a new skill at work, but complain about being passed over for promotions

“We struggle just to make ends meet”

A close cousin of “poor man” who can’t get ahead, this group thinks it could get ahead if it weren’t for a variety of external forces holding them back. Rising gas prices, a shrinking economy, and the President of the United States all conspire to keep them down. They spend up to their income (and then some), save virtually nothing and frequently splurge on unnecessary items because “they deserve it” (see below).

How to identify members of this group:

• They can frequently be spotted moving about new car lots on Sunday afternoons leaving a trail of drool in their wake
• Convenience stores are a hot spot for picking up the weekly supply of beer and cigarettes
• Several times a year their habitats go dark while they retreat to the nearest beach for a much-deserved break

“Everyone has a car payment - it is a fact of life”

Speaking of new car lots, if you manage to run across a member of the perpetual poor species here and asked them to justify their presence you’ll hear that everyone has to have a car payment. They are too expensive to buy with cash! That may be the smartest thing these types will ever admit. New cars are too expensive to buy with cash, that’s why I choose to buy used cars in good mechanical condition and drive them until the lug nuts fall off.

How to identify members of this group:

• The easiest way to spot members of this group is to look around parking lots at crowded shopping malls. They usually park at least 100ft from the building and perpendicular to the parking spot’s stripes, making sure to take up three spots. This is to lessen the chances of dings from car doors and shopping carts. After all, they pay nearly as much for this automobile as they do for their homes so it makes sense to protect such an “investment.”
• Revving engines, sunburned foreheads in convertibles and Mercedes symbol key chains are other common signs

“The only way to get rich in America is to hit the lottery”

Another personal favorite of mine. The lottery is effectively a government sponsored tax on poor people. Don’t believe me? Check out lottery sales by zip code of any participating state and you will discover that the majority of lottery tickets are sold in the poorest sections of town. It is no secret, really. If you are ever around a gas station on Friday night you see them lined up at the counter forking over $20 of their hard-earned paycheck for their chance at financial glory. And just try telling them that $20 a week in a mutual fund averaging 8% growth for 30 years adds up to $130,000. Who can afford to invest in mutual funds?

How to identify members of this group:

• Frequently spotted at convenience stores, bingo halls and anywhere video poker is allowed
• Usually absent one week out of the year for the annual pilgrimage to Las Vegas, Biloxi or Atlantic City
• Excluded from this category: Otherwise financially independent individuals who play the lottery, or bingo as a hobby

“I work hard so I deserve it”

One of the most common statements of the perpetual poor class. These people typically do work hard, but believe their lavish lifestyles are justified because they are such hard workers, as if no one else is out here hustling for a dollar. Perhaps if they “deserved” less they wouldn’t have to work so hard. The fact is there have been many before you, and many who will come after, who have worked much harder, for much longer periods of time without ever getting a break or a material reward. My great-grandmother raised nine children during the depression era, hand-washing cloth diapers for twenty-two years in a row, preparing meals for eleven people from scratch (and not much scratch to work with), and ironing by candle light late into the night. Sitting in an air conditioned office all day playing with computers would have seemed like a vacation to her.

How to identify members of this group:

• Often seen double parked in front of a Best Buy store trying to squeeze a 52″ plasma television into their hatchback.
• Male species frequently spotted driving huge pickup trucks with six tires, dual exhaust, and an ATV loaded in the back.

“You Can’t Take It With You”

A review of the lifetime earnings statement of this class of perpetual poor would reveal lifetime spending well in excess of lifetime earnings, leaving nothing saved for a rainy day or a future retirement. They expect to work late and die young, leaving little reason to save for their golden years. If they should happen to be forced to retire early they will live on social insecurity, complaining about the benefits all the while. No, we can’t take it with us, but we can be responsible adults and save to support our future selves rather than being a financial burden to our loved ones. We can also use the opportunity to help our loved ones, who will become our legacy, get on solid financial footing and continue the tradition of passing generational wealth to the new branches of our family tree.

How to identify members of this group:

• Savings account balance: $52.29
• Retirement Funds: $0.00 (cashed it out after leaving last job to pay off credit card debt)
• Life insurance coverage: $0.00 - can’t afford the premiums

At various points in my life I have probably been a member of each of the above classes, which inherently qualifies me to make fun of them. However, if you find yourself a member of one of the these perpetual poor classes it doesn’t have to be a permanent diagnosis. It is possible to overcome a perpetual poor mentality, but it involves some heavy-duty lifting on our part to rise above our circumstances. It also takes a complete attitude overhaul, so watch your language!

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I did something last Friday I haven’t done in a very long time. I visited a fast food establishment for lunch. Yes, I have been out to eat a couple times in the last few months, but not for lunch, and not fast food. I was surprised at how expensive the so-called “value meals” were. I frequently see people looped around drive-thru windows on their lunch hour buying $6-$7 “value” meals. It got me to thinking - just how much wealth are we chewing away on our lunch hour?

The costs of fast food. These days the cost of everything seems to be going up, and few product costs are inflating faster than food. With the cost of milk, meats, eggs, and even bread rising across the country, fast food chains are passing the associated increases along to customers. As the price of eating out increases, so does the opportunity costs we pay by not pocketing that money and brown-bagging a lunch made from home.

Costs per month. The brilliance behind “the latte factor,” made famous by author David Bach, was that it got consumers to think long term. Carrying daily costs out to a weekly, monthly and yearly figure was a wake-up call to those who considered a $3 expense to have a minimal impact on their overall financial life. Take fast food for example. A $6 combo meal (which typically includes a drink, sandwich and side order of fries or salad) eaten every day of the five-day workweek will cost customers $30 a week. That $30 a week, times four weeks, adds $120 a month to your food budget.

Costs per year. Continuing our fast food example, that $120 monthly fast food bill becomes a $1,440 annualized expense. Staggering, isn’t it? Imagine the things we could do with $1,400! You could open a Roth IRA, start a 529 plan for your kids, take a couple courses at a local college to further your career, start an emergency fund, or take a paid-for vacation. All for the price of a $6 cheeseburger, french fries and soda. Next time I’m craving a cheeseburger, I think I’ll just make my own from home.

I picked on fast food establishments for purposes of this example, but they are not the only place we throw away hundreds of dollars every year. Pack-a-day smokers spend nearly the same amount to fund their habit, as do beer-drinkers and wine consumers. My vice used to be bottled soft drinks from my old company’s break room. I probably bought a drink or two a day for years over the time I worked there, at $1.00 a pop! All the while I complained about a $500 minimum investment required by a mutual fund I was interested in - where was I going to get $500? I should have started with the vending machine.

The other day my wife and I were just plain bored. We rode to the library to pick up some books, and afterwards neither of us were in the mood to return home. Thanks to the flu bug that had us all down the last week and a half we ran through our “medical” budget and had to adjust other categories down to compensate. This left little money for entertainment, gas or food. So movies, eating out, and a short road trip were obviously not in the budget.

It was at this point that I felt an old thought begin to creep into my head. I suddenly had a strong urge to go shopping, and just use our “emergency” credit card to cover the trip. I could think of several things we needed to pick up - some ingredients to try a recipe we read online, a new pair of tennis shoes for my daughter, and Easter basket goodies for the kids. Besides, we had been in the house all weekend, and the walls were beginning to close in a bit. It wasn’t our fault that we all got sick and required several prescriptions. Don’t illnesses technically count as emergencies?

My wife and I looked at each other as if we knew the other was having the exact same thought. We resisted the urge to spend and instead returned home to play outside with the kids. We found some old “bubble stuff” in the garage and spent the afternoon blowing bubbles and jumping on our trampoline. I was proud that we had managed to overcome the temptation to spend, and it made me acutely aware of how far we had come.

Emotional shoppers tend to spend when they are sad to make themselves feel better. Emotional shoppers tend to shop when they are happy to celebrate. Emotional shoppers tend to shop when they are bored (I definitely used to belong to this club) to give them something to do. Notice a pattern? It is no surprise people who let their emotions drive their shopping patterns frequently find themselves in debt. In fact, it contributed to my own accumulation of credit card debt, but it wasn’t the only factor. My wife and I frequently shopped because we were bored, or stressed out at my old job. I realize now that I was simply using shopping as a coping mechanism, much like an alcoholic has a drink every afternoon to “take the edge off.” Or like smokers need a cigarette to “calm their nerves.” It wasn’t until I came to this realization that I was finally able to protect myself from myself, by shredding the credit cards and forcing myself to live on a written budget.

Image Credit: i.m. indraneel

Over the last few days I’ve been reflecting on my remaining debt and trying to inventory what that debt represents. If you are in debt, too, it can actually be a frustrating exercise. There were the somewhat justifiable portions of debt related to school expenses, illnesses, and family emergencies. However, I could barely account for 30% of the total debt from those types of expenditures. After surfing through old credit card statements and looking as far back as the online banking sites would allow it occurred to me most of the debt could be attributed to my failure to resist “financial peer pressure.”

Financial peer pressure comes in many forms, and from many sources:

• “Keeping up with the Joneses.” This is the self-imposed pressure we feel to keep up with others. If the neighbor gets a new car ours suddenly doesn’t look as pretty. If our friends upgrade to a larger house we suddenly start to feel claustrophobic.

• “Impress the in-laws.” Naturally, newly married guys have a tendency to want to impress their in-laws. We want to give the impression that their daughter has married into financial security and ease any doubts they may have about us as a provider for their little girl. I was guilty of this early on, particularly after my wife decided to stay home with our newborn in our second year of marriage. I suspected our family wondered if we could pull this off, but I was very reassuring, “Yeah…we’re doing great!” The reality was we were scraping by and failed to adjust our spending after dropping back to one income. The ensuing lifestyle debt” accounts for a significant portion of our remaining balance.

• “Impress strangers at a red light.” I mentioned this phenomenon back when discussing the financial hole people dig themselves by buying new cars. It’s hard to justify spending hundreds of dollars a month for the right to drive something “new,” when many times a used alternative would do just fine. Somewhere along the line we Americans decided a car was a reflection of our wealth, a sort of mobile status symbol.

Now that we have identified the source of financial peer pressure, what steps can you take to resist it?

• Quit worrying what other people think about you. This might be the best advice for your financial future. Sam Walton didn’t care what people thought about him when he drove that old pickup truck to new Walmart store openings. Warren Buffet probably couldn’t care less what people think of his clothes, his shoes, or his accessories. I’m not suggesting we walk around looking like a complete slob, but if you want to get out from under financial peer pressure a good first step is to stop wasting your time, money and energy on impressing other people.

• Quit taking advice from broke people. Ever notice that the first ones to give you financial advice are the ones leveraged to their eyeballs in debt? They always have a hot stock tip for you, or tell you to get that second mortgage to pay for a cruise that you “so deserve.” If these people also happen to be close friends or family you may feel some added pressure to take their advice. It’s perfectly acceptable to thank them for their advice and then completely ignore it!

• Don’t follow the crowd if the crowd isn’t headed in the direction you want to be moving. When I tell people that I will not have a car payment for the rest of my life they respond with, “What? Everyone has to have a car payment.” Oh really? Not if everyone saved their money and paid for a used car with cash. Accepting such societal norms are a sure-fire way to steer yourself into unnecessary debt.

Technorati Tags: lifestyle debt, financial peer pressure

Warning: This article may appear to be a complete rant against consumerism. That is only partly true. I am not advocating a life of caveman-like existence, but I am advocating a life free from the addiction to technology’s latest over-priced, over-hyped gadgets that are oversold to a society drowning in debt. Take a deep breath, forget everything you’ve learned from Best Buy about required technology, and follow along on my journey to live without a single dollar in my “electronics upgrade envelope.” Here’s a list of the “must have” tech gadgets that I don’t have, and unless I receive as gifts, probably never will have.

1. The Nintendo Wii. I was way ahead of Nintendo on this one. I’ve been throwing remote controls around my living room for years during college football games. They make a mint off the idea and I’m stuck buying replacement universal remotes twice a season - go figure. My favorite excuse for buying a Wii is to help “kids get exercise.” I know things have changed, but when I was a kid exercise looked more like riding a bike and playing basketball with my friends, not standing in front of a game console.
2. TomTom. I keep a neatly bound collection of maps of various roads I might travel safely stowed under the backseat floor mat. It’s called a road atlas, and it set me back $8.42 at Sam’s Club. No power, subscription, or satellite up-link required. Like I would ever look up directions anyway - don’t you know guys are born with the ability to use celestial navigation to triangulate the position of any convenience store in the country.
3. The iPhone. A $600 cell phone doesn’t seem very frugal, does it? Ok, so it is more than a cell phone, but will it really replace your computer, your mp3 player and your digital camera? Probably not. Use the $600 to upgrade your home computer and you’ll be much more efficient than trying to work on a screen the size of a deck of playing cards. Besides, desktops aren’t as likely to shatter when they fall out of your pocket.
4. Voice Activated Car Stereos. Let me get this straight - I yell out the name of a song or artist and my stereo system plays it for me automatically? I could see this being a problem in my world. “Honey, I wish you were here with me - it’s a beautiful day?” Suddenly the lyrics from U2 start buzzing through the speakers. I think I’ll stick with my old-fashioned radio. It pretty much ignores everything I say, and never follows any of my instructions. It’s almost like having the kids right there in the car with me.
5. Ipods, Nanos, and their “shuffling” cousins. There are a ton of mp3 players on the market that do basically the same thing as the iPod. This is a case of people paying for a brand name. Sure, my $19.95 mp3 player from Amazon.com probably doesn’t have a digital LED readout, a shuffle feature, or a hot pink faceplate kit, but it serves up my couple dozen favorite songs reliably enough.
6. Plasma televisions. Sometimes I think I must be the last guy alive who doesn’t own a plasma television, especially after Super Bowl weekend. Now, I am not completely immune to the normal technology desires of the average American male. I’ve stood in front of my share of plasma screens on display marveling at the video quality, and picturing that 60″ behemoth hanging on my living room wall. However, I just can’t bring myself to pay for something that is three times the value of my car. Besides, with our cable cut down to basic offerings there isn’t much left worth watching. “Everybody Loves Raymond” reruns look surprisingly good on our old 32″ television.
7. Bluetooth. When these things first hit the market I had not been around them much. I flew out to Denver for a business trip, collected my luggage at the airport and headed for the rental car shuttle. I sat down on the bus with only a few other people and suddenly the woman next to me starts screaming at no one in particular. I really thought the woman was crazy, or on drugs (or both). The guy across the shuttle from us must have been amused by my reaction because he leaned over and said, “She’s on the phone.” For the remainder of our trip around the rental car lot I looked for that phone, but never found it. It wasn’t until she got off the bus that I noticed a glowing blue appendage on her ear. That was my introduction to a “bluetooth” and I swore I would never get one. The only thing more annoying are those 2-way cell phones that sounds like a walkie-talkie. Please, have some courtesy - put the phone up to your ear and have a semi-private conversation with the person on the other end.

Which cool technology gadget do you secretly covet, but refuse to purchase?

Over the weekend I was looking around for game ideas to include in our family fun nights. I remembered how much fun it was playing board games with my grandfather growing up. He taught me chess, checkers, Yahtzee and several other classic games in our times together. Since I wanted to put an educational spin on family fun night (and even better, a financial education spin) I thought about picking up Monopoly. What I found horrified me.

I had read some time ago that Monopoly was doing away with cash, but until I saw the packaging of the “Electronic Banking” version I had no idea just how ridiculous this idea was. Apparently, the marketing gurus at Parker Brothers thought it would be a good idea to drop Monopoly money for plastic banking cards. After all, it is so much “more convenient” than cash, right? The product description for the game on Amazon.com is almost laughable:

“The Monopoly Electronic Banking Edition game combines the best of classic Monopoly with updated electronic transactions. As with the original version, players still operate with money, learn real-world economics, competition and strategy, try to stay out of jail, and try their best to get filthy rich. But this version has been updated to reflect changes in how the real world uses money: All transactions are conducted with Monopoly’s new banking card system. Anyone from age 8 and up will enjoy this updated version of one of the world’s most famous games. “

Encouraging kids to use plastic over cash is a bad idea. While I’m sure Visa and Mastercard love the idea of kids getting acclimated to their products at eight years old, this Dad would never bring this product home. Kids need to learn that money comes in finite supply, and the old version of Monopoly Jr. helped reinforce that idea. If you used all your money to finance real estate purchases, and didn’t have enough rent coming in, you went broke. When your stack of money ran dry you were out of the game. Seeing the pile of money in front of them grow smaller and smaller helped kids understand the concept that you could not spend more than you earn - an idea most adults still haven’t figured out.

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Technorati Tags: Monopoly, banking cards